If I say that you are special, there is no one like you in this whole wide world and you deserve nothing but the best of all.
Will you believe?
I know for most of us it is difficult to relate because we have this habit of sabotaging ourselves.
If somebody had told me these lines 2-3 years back, I would be like- Ummm… Not really….. I mean what is so good about me?
Maybe that’s what you are also thinking.
But now, I don’t want anybody to say good things to me and validate me because now, I have that knowing within myself that
- I am deserving
- I am special
- I am beautiful
- I am a free spirit and I do whatever I want when I want and with whoever I want.
And believe me, when you have this knowing within you, that’s when things start to change for the good.
Do you want to know the secret behind this shift?
And a quick disclaimer that self-love is not about being self-absorbed and being narcissist, it is about our mental and emotional health and well being.
11 SELF LOVE HABITS TO FOLLOW FROM THIS WOMEN’S DAY 2021
Let’s start with the first habit
1. START YOUR DAY WITH AFFIRMATIONS
I cannot stress enough how effective this is.
5 minutes of daily affirmations can help you bring that positive shift in your thought process.
You need to trust me on this. Just try it yourself for a few days and see the magic.
You will see that you have started believing in yourself more.
How to do it?
- Stand in front of a mirror, look straight into your eyes and repeat the affirmations. You can repeat it either in your head or aloud, that is completely up to you.
- Put on your earphones and listen to affirmations every morning and night right before you go to sleep.
You can choose whatever works best for you.
Morning affirmations are such a bliss, you will notice that your days have become more productive now.
I love to fall asleep while listening to the affirmations.
This is the best thing I have discovered for myself.
You can easily find the recorded affirmations on youtube.
But just keep in mind that it is not an overnight process. It takes time, consistency and you have to be a little patient with yourself that brings me to the next point.
2. BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF
We human beings have this common tendency of being impatient. We want things to get going quickly in our favour. See you have to understand one thing that good things take time.
And you have to be patient with yourself in the entire journey. It will be full of up and down moments. There will be situations where you will feel like things are not moving ahead, you are not progressing anywhere. You will make mistakes and probably will think ‘oh my god I am so dumb I don’t even understand this much.’
We start judging and criticizing ourselves for not being perfect and up to the mark and what not.
But know that it’s just a part of the journey and not the destination.
Moving slowly is not something that one should be afraid or guilty of because you know you are less likely to stumble if you walk slow. If you try to run, the chances of stumbling become more, which I am sure nobody would like.
If you are highly impatient I would suggest you to start practicing meditation. Believe me it will help you a lot, just in few weeks, you will see that your patience level has increased.
3. ACCEPT YOUR STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES
Everybody has strengths and weaknesses.
Often we embrace our strengths with pride but run away from our weaknesses.
The biggest problem is that we don’t want to accept the problem.
Tell me how you are gonna improve if you don’t know your areas of improvement?
Knowing your weaknesses gives a better understanding of how you should function to achieve your desired goal.
So instead of avoiding or running away from your fears, accept them.
Contemplate on yourself and don’t be afraid to accept the not so good side of yourself.
Once you have realized it, take action to convert your weakness into a strength.
And yes be patient with yourself.
4. STOP COMPARING YOURSELF WITH OTHERS
My parents never compared me to anybody till date.
Do you think I am lucky?
Because I did it for myself.
I was the one who compared myself with every friend I followed on social media.
Every time I opened my feed, there used to be sudden mood shifts because I was so into comparing myself with random people.
Now when I think of that moment, I feel so stupid.
How can I be so naive?
Somehow I realized this very late in my life but I want to put it all for you just in case you are following the same path.
If you relate with what I said, then my friend I must tell you, you are in a very wrong way that will lead you nowhere but to dissatisfaction.
You may blame social media how much you want but that’s not going to make any difference because the real culprit is you, yourself.
So what can you do?
Just relax and think
Everybody is putting their best foot forward on social media. Nobody will show you their average side and forget about showing the dark side.
Understand that it’s all a hoax that goes on social media.
Nobody’s life is a cakewalk, everyone has their challenges. And there is absolutely no point in comparing yourself to others.
5. DON’T WAIT FOR VALIDATION FROM OTHERS
Who knows you the best?
Or you, yourself?
Of Course, it is you,
So why do you want validation from others?
Give up this habit of needing approval from others right now.
Only you are the one who can take charge of your life and decide what is best for you.
Never run behind pleasing people because trust me people will find a way to reject you in some or the other way.
6. LEARN TO SAY NO
Learn to say no without feeling guilty and without explaining yourself. Understand that you can’t be there for everyone, every time.
Learn to differentiate between people who really want help from you and people who are there just to take advantage of you.
I had a hard time overcoming this problem.
Every time I said no to someone, I thought I was becoming this bad person who was selfish and didn’t want to help people.
Even when I knew their true intentions these thoughts wouldn’t leave my mind.
But I was so wrong.
Over some time, I realized that creating boundaries is actually so healthy for my mental peace.
I mean why do you have to take the extra burden of others’ problems and add to your existing ones.
7. CELEBRATE YOUR MISTAKES
Are you still ashamed or embarrassed about something that you did?
It’s the time to let go, all of that. Free yourself from the pressure to be a perfectionist.
It is impossible to be an error-free person.
Mistakes aren’t that bad.
The lessons that you learn from them, Isn’t that priceless?
Did you know microwave, penicillin, chocolate chip cookies, and many other examples were invented accidentally? If somebody didn’t make that mistake then, probably they would not have discovered all these awesome inventions.
Mistakes are the proof that you are heading in the right direction, that you are trying.
Don’t hold grudges against yourself for the times when you were not good enough.
Do not hesitate to experiment, make mistakes-lots of them.
And see how you learn and grow in your life. There will come a point in your life where you will look back and laugh for being so silly.
8. BE KIND TO YOURSELF
Do you have a moment to appreciate yourself?
Think of a time when you handled a tough situation.
See how lovely you look today.
Appreciate that you are reading about self-love
And hey congrats!
You finally made up your mind to love yourself.
Take care of your gorgeous body, move it a little and fill it with good healthy stuff.
Forgive yourself for all the stupid things you did. Embrace your imperfections.
Let go of the memories of any incident that disturbs your inner peace. Understand, the past cannot be changed, so there is no point cursing yourself but the future is still in your hand.
Make it better, make it beautiful!
9. LET GO OF TOXIC PEOPLE
When you surround yourself with toxic people
- You forget how good life is
- You forget how capable you are
- You forget how kind, compassionate and beautiful you are
- You forget that you have a mind and voice of your own
Letting go of toxic people is the most urgent thing you need to do to protect yourself.
There is a saying, stay away from negative people, they have a problem for every solution.
You should always limit your time with people that continually drain your energy and add no value to your life.
Keep your life free from drama and negativity.
The people in your life should be reducing your stress, not causing more of it.
Surround yourself with positive people, people that make you feel good about yourself.
Everyone comes into your life for a reason, a lesson, or a blessing.
Now you have a choice to make,
You can either choose to live a life according to your standards or live a life according to the standards of the people.
10. PAMPER YOURSELF
Take some time off where you get to spend time just with yourself.
Grab a cup of tea or coffee and sit alone for some time, without any disturbances. Think of your dreams, desires, what do you expect from your life and what are you doing to get there.
Start your day by saying something positive to yourself, follow your skincare, hair care routine, dress up and get ready even if you don’t have to step out of your home.
Once in a while book yourself a relaxing session of spa or massage.
Get creative, follow your passion, express yourself in whatever way you like and do whatever makes you happy.
Don’t forget to reward yourself for every little accomplishment. Pat your back and be proud of your achievements.
Celebrate it, gift yourself a happy yummy meal or a dress or anything you like.
Because you know what?
You deserve it all girl!
11. PUT YOURSELF FIRST
Often for women, putting herself first is a challenging task
Isn’t it ladies?
You will agree with me on this,
We have so many relations to take care of,
We are somebody’s sister, daughter, wife, daughter in law and what not but often while satisfying all these relations and making everyone happy, we lose relation with our soul.
We feel this pressure to take care of everyone in our family, to make sure that everyone is happy and alright.
Well indeed it is our responsibility but we must not forget ourselves, it shouldn’t cost us our emotional or mental well-being.
Put yourself first, without feeling guilty.
Remember, it doesn’t make you a selfish person, it is a smart move because you cannot serve others when your own vessel is empty.
The most important relationship you have is with yourself, put it on the top of your priority list.
People, relationships will come and go but your mind, body, and soul will never leave you till your last breath. So why not invest more love, care, empathy, and compassion in yourself.
This is the best you can do for yourself.
So make a promise today to yourself that self-love will be a priority for you, for now, and forever.
Do let me know what habits are you going to apply in your life to become the best version of yourself?